No one talks about 4

Why is none talking about the pride and ache and straight up violent leap that is the age of 4. 

The age where we watch our babies turn into kids. 

Mumbled words turn into complete sentences and the question “why?” follows every statement. Block houses turn into elaborate monster truck ramps and scribbles on scrap paper turn into family portraits signed with their name. 

Imaginations run wild & new connections are made every day.

Energy spikes and creativity thrives.

They aren’t babies anymore.. they are magical and wonderful little kids.

And my eyes are wet as I write this because I’m so proud of them and simultaneously I’m so beyond sad that their baby years are behind us. That they’ll never say “Wawa” again when asking for water – they just get themselves a cup now. And instead of saying “ball” they say “Mom, want to play catch with me”. 

It feels like this past year stole their babyhood.. their toddlerhood. 5 is right around the corner and so is the beginning of years filled with learning and friends and activities. 

So grateful and sad, happy and mourning, full of love and full of sorrow. The perfect example of how riveting motherhood can be on both ends of the emotional spectrum all at the same time. 

It’s true what they say – it goes by fast. And the first 4 years, in the home, molding, shaping & witnessing their little personalities with minimal influence are by far the most magical years as a parent (and the hardest!). 

The most heartwarming and heartbreaking thing as a mother is to watch your little baby whom you put your blood sweat and tears into nurturing slip into an incredible young kid interacting with the world around them. 

We are only 5 years in — I can’t even begin to imagine 5 more after that .. 

Signed, 

A proud sad mom